Please Care What Others Think

In 2016

I was about to open a play at the Sydney Opera House

I was playing one of my favourite characters (Valentine Coverly)

In one of my favourite plays (Arcadia)

By one of my favourite writers (Stoppard)

I hadn’t been on stage in almost eighteen months

And I was scared

The last experience I had in that theatre had been a painful one

And I didn’t quite know how I was going to handle being in front of an audience again

After working with an incredible coach

I had experienced one of the most enjoyable rehearsal periods of my life

I was playing freely in the room

And was finally feeling like I was giving work I wanted to

But the time came for previews

(That first taste of giving the work to the public)

Yup

Same old stuff

The same self doubt

The same negative self talk

The same beating the shit out of myself

It all came out of the wood work once more

I remember clenching the handlebars and swearing the entire ride home on my motorbike

Just when I thought I was turning pro

Just when I thought I could give work I was actually proud of

Just when I thought I was finally free from caring about what others think

Nope

Felt like quick sand was sucking me down again

And I spent the whole show standing on stage like a deer in the headlights

I remember thinking

“It’s like my doubts and fears took steroids as soon as I stood in front of the audience”

I was beating the crap out of myself

Why?

Because I believed it was bad to care what others thought about me

I’m gonna say that again

I believed it was bad for me to care what others thought about me

But let’s look at this from an evolutionary perspective

All of my biology is designed to help keep me alive

And in order to keep me alive

It has to keep me caring about what the group thinks

Why?

Well, who dies first?

The group who can work together to fend off predators?

Or the person rejected by the group standing alone against the bear?

We need the group

My body needs the group in order to survive

It needs to be surrounded by people I care about and who care about me

More people means more resources, more productivity, more security

Group equals life

Alone equals death

So damn sure my biology is going to do everything possible

To keep me caring about what others are thinking

That sounds pretty reasonable

If I care what others think, there’s a better chance I’m going to have a longer life

And therefore, be able to help the species survive another day

What’s my point?

I could not think of a bigger waste of time & energy

Than trying to not care about what others think

Our bodies are literally designed to do it

It’s what helped us get here

So please don’t disrespect the last two hundred thousand years of evolution

It is more than okay to care what others think

In fact

Its bloody wonderful to care what others think!

It says you’re a human!

And we need more human actors

Not more cool cats who hide their humanity by trying to pretend they don’t care

But… What about the solution you ask?

How does one allow themselves to care what others think but still move forward?

By being clear and honest about what is worth caring about most

Awareness equals choice

If you’re aware of what’s truly worth caring about

Then the next time you become paralysed by caring what others think

You’ll be able to choose where to place your attention

You’ll be able to bring your focus back to what is clearly and honestly most important to you

Like…

The work

Contributing meaningful work

Sharing meaningful stories

To the group

So the group can all care about something together

And thus survive another day on this Earth

Aren’t humans great?

Hope this helps

X

Finding Your Own Way

Who broke the world of acting?

Who really changed the game?

Advanced the craft by leaps and bounds within a lifetime?

Who did something no one else was even dreaming of?

Who’s shoulders are we standing on?

And why would the hell would I care?

Mmm

(For the love of god, this is not a boring history lesson - Just trust me with this one)

I grew up loving artists like Philip Seymour Hoffman & Daniel Day-Lewis

Those actor’s grew up watching Streep, De Niro, Pacino & Cazale

They in turn were inspired by the magic of Brando, Monroe & Dean (the first man to actually cry on screen)

And those incredible artists were trained durig the great shift in American acting

Stella Adler and Lee Strasburg were beginning their ground breaking teaching careers (as well as their famous rivalry) in NYC

And of course, Adler & Strasberg (and many other great teachers) were influenced by the godfather

Russian director, Konstantin Stanislavsky.

In drama schools across the world

Stanislavsky’s “system” is still used as the basic building block of acting today

(For now, I won’t get into Stanislavsky’s drastic & crucial reversal of his opinions on acting in his later years which everyone seems to conveniently forget about)

So

There we have it

We have a bunch of teachers who changed the game.

But…

Who were they influenced by?

In 1873

During a time of bombastic shmacting

Where physical poses and facial gestures were the extent of the craft

A fourteen year old Italian girl said “hold my beer”

Eleonora Duse

Began doing something no one had ever considered

She dug beneath the lines of her character to portray what she called “the invisible side of life” (ref. Sheehy).

She gave herself permission to feel things on stage

She even famously blushed

Like, actually blushed in a scene - which audiences went freaking bananas at - as this was unheard of.

Now, to do something different during this day and age

Of course

Brought its challenges

And to quote the film Moneyball

“The first person through the wall always gets bloody”

And damn sure Duse got her fair share of trolls

An actor-manager, infuriated by her refusal to take line readings, shouted

“What makes you think you’re an artist?”

On top of this

She never wore makeup and failed to strike the expected poses

One reviewer simply wrote

“She doesn’t look beautiful, but she does look real”

Anyway

You get the point

This actress changed the game

Strasberg even went so far as telling his students at the prestigious NYC Actors Studio

“The theatre will require the next hundred years to deal with what Duse represented,”

And Stanislavsky’s famous “system” was, in fact, inspired by Duse’s artistry.

Now…

Why does this all matter?

When I had just finished drama school

I was desperately wanting someone to tell me what to do

To tell me how to act

How to dress

How to behave

Just tell me what to do so I could have the career I dreamed of

Then

Someone handed me a book called “Duse’s Blush”

And one single quote from that book smacked me across the face

“There can be no generalisations as far as the art of acting is concerned.

There can be no overall “method”.

Above all, no short cuts.

Each actor must find his own way for himself.”

Hold up

The godmother of modern day acting

The giant whose shoulders we all stand on

Is telling me I have to find my own way for myself!?

This was the moment I realised

Nobody was coming to save me

No-one was going to tell me exactly what to do

I had to go the long way

The slow way

The honest way

I had to start on my own path

I had to build my own way

In a way which works for me

It’s why I started going back to class

It’s why I started reaching out to great coaches for guidance

Great coaches who didn’t tell me what to do, but instead, helped me figure it out for myself

And it’s why I started The Actor’s Blueprint

To help actor’s build it their own unique way

Why the word “blueprint”?

I believe each individual artist has an inherent guidance system

A set of unique values, boundaries and curiosities

Which, when listened to and led by

Allows for the building of a craft and career which works for them, and only them

A blueprint for their unique way of contributing great work to this great craft

So

Thank you

To Eleonora Duse

The woman who broke acting

For encouraging us to go our own way

And to go first

Hope this helps

x

California Dreams

I spent a fair amount of time in LA before the spicy cough arrived

Nine trips over ten years to be exact

Anywhere from three months to ten days at a time

(For some reason they kept getting shorter & shorter - funny that)

But when I think about all of my time spent in California

There is one night which stands out in particular

It involves the most famous actress in the western world

Here we go…

Once upon time

It was 2013

And I had recently been selected as runner-up for the Heath Ledger Scholarship

I was living the LA life

Renting an apartment under the Hollywood sign (Beachwood Canyon represent)

My manager had two clients (John Travolta & myself)

Canyon runs in the mornings

Many hours driving bumper to bumper every day

Constantly prepping for auditions and meetings

Yoga and green smoothies in Los Feliz

Horse riding or surfing in Malibu or San Diego on the weekends

And of course

Partying long into the night

Rinse and repeat

Yeah

Living them sweet Cali dreams

Something which was just part of the routine at that time

Was the Australian actor Saturday night parties

Same people

Same places

Same naughtiness

Every

Single

Week

This one Saturday night

It was theme night

Everyone was to wear white

(Probably something about us being pure in the city of sin)

I remember standing in a white jacket

On the rooftop of a very old famous hotel

Looking up at the big Hollywood sign

Everyone arm in arm

And clicking glasses of champagne

With the usual shouting of

“Wooo!”

“We’re in LA!”

And “We’ve made it!”

A pretty standard Saturday night for this group of Aussies in LA

But something was off about tonight

I had been there for about two months at this point

And it felt strange to be, once again, making the same celebratory noises at a glowing sign

Maybe I was tired

Maybe I was just having an off day

But something interrupted the pattern

And I remember thinking

“Hang on - what are we actually celebrating?”

I was suddenly distracted by my friend who shouted across the rooftop

“Sheasby! Come meet my friend!”

An actress had just walked in

I had heard rumours of this actress

She had just finished filming with Scorsese and DiCaprio

And was well on her way to becoming the the next big thing

For privacy sake let’s call her Margaret Bobbie

Margaret walked in

Was courteous and kind

And left after about 5 minutes

Huh

Yep

She walked in

Said hello

Took a look around

Then left

Now, there is absolutely the probability I’m simply projecting here

But for me that was a little yellow light

The dissonance in my body was pounding

Time to slow down

What was going on?

Why is someone who’s doing great work with great people and getting weekly coaching on her craft

Not interested in hanging with a bunch of actors who spend more time doing substances on the weekend than working on their script for their next audition?

I remember walking to a quiet corner and looking at that grey LA night sky which hardly ever has any stars due to the light pollution

I remember turning around

And I remember seeing everyone smiling and holding their glasses up hollering into the air

And it was the first time on that trip

Where I saw the room differently

Yes, I saw a bunch of actors

But…

Not a single actor was working

Not a single actor was going to class

They enjoyed the lifestyle of being an actor, yes

But I didn’t see the joy of the actual work

I felt really strange

I think, deep down, I knew

There was some teeny tiny part of me that was quite possibly being reflected in who I was surrounding myself with

Kind of like a strange, real life mirror

And sometimes

I don’t always like what I see in the mirror

I remember playing back my time spent in the city up to that point

Mmm

Maybe there was a reason I hadn’t actually landed a single roll yet

I sat down in a beach chair which was conveniently next to me

It had taken two months but I was finally reflecting on what the hell I was doing in LA

Why was I there?

What was I wanting out of the experience?

What did I want to do with the time I had left there?

My thoughts were interrupted

This time a different actor

Alicia

Came and sat down next to me

She asked how I was going

I explained I was feeling pretty strange

About what I had just seen

She responded

“Mike

What the hell

I just saw the same thing”

And a huge sense of relief washed over me

“You saw that too!”

I explained

“Yeah - I feel really weird about it”

Alicia and I sat on those beach chairs

On a roof top

In LA

And discussed what we wanted

We wanted to go to work

We wanted to work with great people

On great material

And contribute the best work we could

To be clear

We were very happy to have a celebration

But there were things higher on the values ladder that we realised were not being taken care of

The conversation ended with Alicia saying

“I think I’m going to go home”

I remember smiling and saying

“Me too”

And with that

Alicia stood up, went home and went to work on an audition she was preparing that week

Which catapulted her into the lead role of a massively successful AMC show which lasted many years

(I actually saw her yesterday plastered on the side of a bus in Sydney for a new show coming out soon - Go Leesh!!!)

As for me

That night in LA

All dressed up in white

I put down the cheap champagne

I walked up to my friend who was in the bathroom

He said “you’re up”

I placed my hands on his shoulders

Told him I loved him

And that it was time for me to go home

I will never forget the look in his eyes

It was like he knew exactly what I actually meant

“I get it”

He responded

We didn't say anything else

We hugged

I walked home

And we never spoke again

That night

I had a long walk in the streets of LA

Listening to the eerie calls of coyotes hunting down their next vulnerable meal

I went back to my couch

Pulled out a Shakespeare audition I had for an upcoming show at the Sydney Opera House

Henry V

And I went back to work

What’s my point?

Sometimes

All I need to do to understand what I’m valuing most

Is to look at my actions

What am I spending my time and energy actually doing?

Drinking champagne in Sin Cty?

Or finding joy in the slow process of contributing meaningful work?

No good, bad, right or wrong

But there is choice

I do have a choice

Hope this helps

X

Advice on Handling the Industry

Imagine 

You are standing on a beach 

And alongside you is a bunch of other actors 

You’re all facing the water (the industry)

And you’re all holding your surfboards (your skillsets)

Some of you have long boards

Some of you have short boards

Some of you have pro boards 

Some of you have something resembling a plank of wood

In front of you is the ever changing swell

Sometimes it looks easy

Other days it looks impossible

But on this day

(It might be the first day after graduating from drama school

Or maybe the day you finally get an agent)

The decision is made to give it a crack

So you grab your board

And dive in

You begin paddling out

Bit wobbly

But at least you’re in it

You’re in the industry!

You look up

To see a big wave (audition) bearing down on you 

You breathe

You focus

And you get smashed

That first rejection feels like nature just dumped on you

You come back to the surface

You feel like a drowned rat 

You think about turning around and going back to shore

You breathe

You decide to keep going 

You realise you have to learn to duck dive

You have to learn to manage rejection

Each rejection begins to feel slightly more manageable 

You notice your peers around you

Some of them got smashed by one or two waves and decided to return to shore

You keep going

Until

You make it passed the break

Things are easier out their 

In the wide open air 

You simply sit on your board and wait for a wave (a job)

You see one

You scramble for it

Desperately 

Your first wave!

You paddle

You put in all your effort

You try force it to work

“This is my wave!” You shout 

And…

You face plant 

You realise trying to force things to work in your favour doesn’t quite work in the real world 

You realise not all waves are meant for you

So you keep floating out there

You begin to build patience 

Because realise the importance of being able to wait well in an uncertain industry 

Sometimes you sit and watch your colleagues pop up with glee as they ride a wave passed you

You shout out to them as they flow by

“YEEEEWWW!”

They look at you and see that you’re genuinely thrilled for them

They smile back 

They will remember this 

You’ve been in the surf for a while now

You notice all your peers are not all in the same place at the same time

Some are sitting on the beach after getting smashed by one too many waves and are just needing some rest

Others are paddling out continuing to try make it passed the rejections

Some are sitting next to you waiting for their wave to come

Others are panting furiously as they try to control every wave and make it the one for them

Some are simply bobbing around whilst lying on their board soaking in the sun and smiling

Others are riding the barrel of a life time

Some have given up and gone home

And that’s okay

You breathe easy

You’re in the arena

You’re doing it

Then 

You look up

An opportunity is coming

There is something about this one

It feels right

Feels like home

You take a breath

You slow down

You calmly get yourself in permission

You remember what your mentors told you

You remember to focus on what you can control 

And you go for it

You paddle

You try

It’s a bit wobbly at first but this time you notice the wobbles and bringing it back to doing it your way

You don’t try surf the way you think you should

You do it the way you really want to 

You’re just at the point of no return

And despite your fears

You commit 

You pop up

You can’t believe it 

You’re up!

You got the gig!

You’re doing it

You’re doing the thing you’ve thought about, trained for, practiced over an over again

It’s exhilarating 

You notice yourself overthinking

Thats fine

Its your first gig!

Then there are moments where the mind goes quiet and you simply are where you are

It feels beautiful

You’re in flow

You surrender to wherever the gig takes you

You ride the wave the whole way back to shore

You notice the experience is coming to an end

You lean back

And just flop into the water

You just had that first ride in the industry!

You feel proud

You feel grateful 

You breathe easier 

Then 

After a few moments to get your bearings again

And when everything has gone quiet 

You ask yourself 

“What now?”

You look up 

You turn around

And you realise

You have to do the entire thing all over again 

You have to paddle out and get smashed by those rejections

All. Over. Again.

This plays with your mind

To enjoy another wave

You have to go through the struggle

The discomfort 

The pain

Again 

And after doing all that work

And getting another gig

This cycle will keep repeating itself

You zoom out

You begin to understand what this career path entails 

Doubt creeps in

Is it worth it?

Is it worth getting rejected five, ten, fifty times just so you can enjoy another wave?

You look around

It’s been a while out their in the industry

You notice there are less of your peers out there 

Is this what you want to be doing?

You think about how sustainable this life is

Things are getting complicated 

Your mind fills with noise

Ugh

The requirements 

You have to take care of things in order to keep doing this

You have to take care of your health so you can keep paddling

You have to take care of your wealth so you can afford necessities

You have to take care of your skills so you can keep riding those bigger waves which are sitting just outside your comfort zone 

You have to take care of the people you love so you can enjoy the water with them

You have to take care of your vehicle so you can simply keep driving to the beach

The level of work required just to ride a bloody wave!

Noise noise noise 

STOP

You tell your mind

You’ve had enough of the overwhelming thoughts 

You breathe

You know

Something is worth it

Your body knows

It knows the feeling of play

The feeling of contributing generously when you step into that place of flow 

You know what home feels like for you

So you accept

You decide to keep going

You surrender to all that you can’t control 

And thus 

The rhythm begins to build

Your duck-diving has improved 

So you’re handling the rejections better than when you first entered the industry 

They still hurt - But you now have ways to make it through

You make it passed the break

You enjoy waiting patiently out there 

You trust that next wave is coming with your name on it

You ride it your way

Then

You turn around

You start again

You’re just in it now

You’re in the arena

This is your normal now

You’re home.

Occasionally 

You see the new little grommets line up on the beach with their boards looking excitedly (or trepidatiously) at the water

You tell them to just start paddling out

That they will learn more by getting uncomfortable than they ever could by sitting on the beach & overthinking things

You know how important it is for them to start understanding the tides, rhythms and swells of the industry 

As well as how important it is to just get smashed by those first few waves

Because you know how capable they are.

Every once and a while

You see a new actor on the beach

Get approached by some folks on a jet ski

“Don’t worry about getting smashed by those waves!

We’ll take you the easy way around all those rejections

We’ll get you some barrels without having to feel uncomfortable in the water”

You see the actors’ eyes light up at the suggestion of a short cut

You see them hop on and get a ride straight passed the difficult break 

You watch them get towed onto that barrel of a life time without even having to paddle

You see the sheer delight in their face

A part of you feels strange

Like you’re watching someone have everything handed to them

A feeling of jealousy pops up 

“Why can’t I get my free ride passed the break?

Why can’t I just get the barrel of a life time?

Why can’t I be given a wave that gets me on the cover of every magazine in the world”?

You feel bitter

Resentful

You know that resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die

But you just can’t to stop the darkness 

“What’s going on - this isn’t me!?”

You realise what being in the industry is doing to your mind

“I hate this!”

You scream

You feel defeated

You feel like you’re being told to paddle in

You sit down on the sand 

You can’t fight it anymore

So you just give up

Your body breathes

Heaves 

You give it permission to just feel what its feeling

Release what it wants to release

It feels surprisingly good

After a while you feel open

Like you’ve let something go

Like you’ve surrendered 

You accepted where you actually are

Hunched over on the ground

You look up 

You notice something

That grommet

Who got the free ride

They are standing at the waters edge

They’re struggling now

They haven’t had to do this before

They haven’t had to struggle through the chaos in order to catch a wave

After getting the most amazing opportunity

They have still found themselves in the same place as everyone else

Something clicks 

You realise

No artist avoids the cycles of nature 

No matter what happens

At some point

Every actor has to face the struggle of rejections

Every actor has to deal with the chaos of the industry

But every actor is simply moving through the cycles of the industry at different times

This makes you stop

You begin to think about what’s truly most important 

What are the things that are actually worth caring about?

Actually worth giving your attention to?

Things like 

Finding joy in the effort 

Working on growing your skills

Being out there with people you love 

And simply giving yourself permission to enjoy riding the wave itself when one comes along with your name on it

And sometimes, knowing when to put the board down and go get an ice cream

Hope this helps 

X

Big Bad Agents

People say they want an agent

But often

Their desire for an agent is overpowered by the fear of rejection

And why the hell wouldn’t it be?

We are social creatures

To get rejected by an agent might feel like the tribe saying

“We don’t think you’re capable enough 

You’re unwanted”

Ouch

So lets just get this out of the way right now

And acknowledge how terrifying trying to get an agent can be

And then let’s get clear about how we can get one that we love

Story time

When I was at drama school (2008-2010)

There was one day which was feared above all others

It was the day where you received “the list”

After three years of intense training 

You would go back into NIDA one week after graduating 

Line up outside a small room

And enter alone

In this room there would be a member of staff sitting behind a desk

With a piece of paper

They would slide the piece of paper across the table

And on the piece of paper 

Were contact details of the agencies who were interested in representing you

…The list 

It was then your job to organise the meetings and hopefully find a match

Yep

Three years of technical training at Australia’s most prestigious institute for performing artists 

Boiled down to a day where people became associated with a number

There might be zero names on your list

There might be twenty names on your list 

And no matter how enlightened you were

Regardless of how much you pretended not to care about external results

The question on everyones mind was 

How wanted were you?

“I got 9”

“Lilly got 3”

“Dave got 14!”

Now

I had some friends in the years above who I thought were really cool

And I wanted to be cool like them

They told me that if I didn’t get offers from two particular agencies 

Who were the big boys back in my day

Then I was basically screwed

These were the same cool cats that said “six packs will get you more work then voice work ever will”

So when I entered my third year

I created what I thought was a plan

(Really it was just focussing on a result without any actionable steps)

I wrote the names of those two agencies on pieces of papers which I stuck on my wall, above my bed, in front of the toilet 

Everywhere

I thought if I kept focussing on the result of getting offers from those two agencies 

Then their names would magically be there on the list at the end of the year

To my absolute horror

When the list was handed to me

Those two names were nowhere to be found

I kept trying to figure out where the spelling mistakes were 

“They obviously must be here somewhere!?”

My heart began pounding

This couldn’t be

Three years of work

Down the drain

All for nothing

What’s worse was that I had seven friends who all signed with those two big agencies within a short time frame

The comparing sapped any last joy I had

“I will never work now

I will never get the opportunities

I will never be a professional actor”

Yeah

I really believed that in order to work

I had to get an offer from specifically those two agencies

A pretty strong belief system I was holding tightly on to

A story I was rigidly telling myself

(And obviously ignoring the fact that a huge number of amazing working actors are represented by other agencies in this country)

A few days passed

I eventually got out from underneath my bed

And despite feeling like I was screwed 

I started to reach out to the people on my list

The meetings commenced

Meetings to find a match

Oh boy

I can remember one where I was sitting at a glass table 

And a well groomed man with perfect eye brows asked me

“Are you a star? 

We only take stars!”

And me faking the most lack lustre confidence in return 

“Uh... Yeah… I’m a star!”

Ew

I felt a tremendous urge to push

To step into someone else’s skin

Someone who was super confident

Charming

Cool

When really I felt the opposite 

I felt scared

Confused 

I felt unwanted

Yes, I was getting opportunities to have meetings with agencies

But they weren’t with the two big shots 

So the confused, young and inexperienced graduate version of me was feeling mighty woeful 

But there was one name on the list I wasn’t looking at seriously

Why?

Because they didn’t have an office address where all the others did

And I thought

“If they aren’t in Redfern or Darlinghurst, how can they be a serious agent?”

But I was running out of options

So I got in my car 

And drove to a suburb far away from the city

Located in a beautiful ocean bay 

I walked up a long driveway

Entered a house 

Sat down on a couch

And was greeted by two little dogs who came and played with my shoes

And for the next 90 minutes

I drank a cup of tea

Overlooking a calm and tranquil rainforest 

And had an honest chat with an extremely kind woman

She did more listening than talking

And asked questions which genuinely got me curious 

It didn’t feel like an agent meeting at all

It didn’t look like the ones I had seen on TV

There were no power games or pretending

My body wasted no energy trying to show or push

Just… an honest conversation 

Eventually we had a hug and said our goodbye’s 

And I remember thinking as I left

“Surely that can’t be a legit agent”

“That felt too… easy”

I spent two days thinking about my decision

Do what I should do & go with suits and fancy glass tables?

Or go with my body & hang out with people I like?

Thirteen years later

Yesterday, in fact

That remarkable woman

Who is still my agent today

Swung by my house to drop off gifts for my newborn daughter (who now shares the same birthday as her)

I actually can’t go into describing my agent without my eyes getting glassy

It has been one of the most significant relationships in my life

We have spoken at least every week for thirteen years straight

This in an industry where the vast majority of actors I know feel uncomfortable about calling their representation for a simple chat

She has been there to console me during my biggest losses

And by my side to celebrate the highs

She has consistently reminded me to bring it back to an enjoyable process 

Especially when my mind has raced ahead and started to push for results 

Or when I get scared & start comparing myself to others

She does things her way

And she supports & encourages her artists to do it theirs

Side note

The seven friends I knew who went with those two big shot agencies at the time?

Every. Single. One.

Has left them for other agencies due to unsatisfactory professional relationships. 

At the end of the day

They thought it was more valuable to have someone they could speak with honestly and openly 

The fancy bells and whistles just ain’t sustainable

And people eventually get tired of having to put on a “winning smile” all the time

Back to my agent…

It’s a fairytale story, right?

Hold your horses 

18 months after signing with my Australian agent

I was the runner-up in the Heath Ledger Scholarship

Which got me free tickets to go get set up in LA

Ooo 

The shoulds began again

“I HAVE to get one of the big 5 agents in the USA

Otherwise I will never work!”

Now

If I thought I had some interesting meeting experiences in Australia

America said “hold my beer”…

“There’s no one like you Sheasby!”

“Nobody could pull off double denim like you bro!”

“There’s some great strip clubs in your area, we should hit them up brother!”

The glass tables were longer

Instead of two or three people sitting opposite me 

There were now eleven

The pushing to impress was on steroids 

And I swallowed it hook, line and sinker

I laughed at the jokes that weren’t funny

I smiled like I had seen guys smile in toothpaste adverts rather than smiling like myself 

And I nodded my head at whatever was presented in front of me 

All despite my gut screaming

“This doesn’t feel good!”

There was one lady though

Whom my Australian agent insisted I meet

Let’s call her Jenny

She repped actors I really admired including Viggo & Malkovich 

Jenny said she had full books but was open to having a chat

What could I lose?

So after 10 days of exhausting schmoozing in LA

I walked into her office and flopped on her couch

She straight away took her shoes off

And flopped on the other couch across the room

We both gave up

And

Like my Australian agent

She listened more than spoke

Asked wonderfully curious questions

And gave me the space to explore my answers 

In fact, within half an hour I had tears rolling down my cheeks whilst discussing a personal relationship that was giving me grief at the time

Point being

Just some easy, honest chats

No facades

No games

No bells & whistles

That night

As I strolled along the path to a fancy dinner 

Where the chandelier was worth more than the house I grew up in

My phone rang

“Jenny would love to represent you”

Oh!

I was really surprised

But I knew I was about to have a meeting with possibly the coolest agent in LA

Who repped even cooler actors 

So I said “Let me call you back tomorrow”

That evening 

I was wined and dined like never before

Told crazy stories about partying with some of the biggest actors in Hollywood

Promised the keys to the city

And was given a lift home in a sports car

God 

I felt cool

It felt like such a lie

I knew where the real value in this industry was - What someone contributes in between action and cut

But still

I felt cool.

When I got back to Australia and sat down with my wonderful agent

She listened to me describe all the meetings and people

And in her extraordinary and wise way she said

“Pretty clear to me who you would work best with, Mike

I think you have to go with your gut on this”

I knew it too

But this time

I didn’t listen

I chose cool

And it is still to this day, one of the only things I regret in my 20 years of acting

I have never in my life regretted going with my gut

But I have absolutely regretted not listening to my body 

The funny thing is

I believe that in the long run

Truth will always find a way to reveal itself 

No matter how much I have tried to should my way into be cool, charming, confident, etc 

At some point 

I end up tripping on the red carpet and laughing like a kid

Saying an awkward joke which no-one but me understands

Or having my insecurities or nerves shine through brightly 

And what I have found

Is when I give myself permission to stumble, cry, feel what I feeling

That’s when I find people I match with really well

If I could boil networking down to one principle?

Hang out with people you like

People who you resonate with

So

How to get an agent…

Time to slow down and be kind :)

(Also time to get a pen and pad)

One

How do you want the relationship to feel (kind, honest, collaborative, professional, etc)

Two

Find artists in the industry you resonate with & look at who represents them

Three

Create a short, honest list of agents you wish to share a cup of tea with (2-3 great options)

Four 

Have everything ready to go (Honest & concise cover letter, 2/3 bits of footage you’re actually proud of, headshot, etc)

Five 

Find a genuine approach in line with your values - This is a big one

To do the same thing as everyone else and expect a unique result… 

Might be a little delusional 

So the last thing I would do is send a cold email to an address designed for spam

Agents have firewalls set up to prevent the onslaught of “can you rep me?”

Someone’s nephew is sitting at a desk right now copying and pasting the same response to those 20 emails per day without actually looking at them

“Thank you, but our books are full”

So find a way which works for you

Do you know someone you resonate with who has an agent they resonate with who can give you a number to call for a cuppa?

Or is it time to pull up your socks and go do the terrifying but courageous act of walking up to people and introducing yourself in public?

Is it time to write a handwritten note and attach it to flowers or a pizza?

Would you prefer to knit a scarf and send it in a box with a headshot that says “I promise I can act better than I knit”?

Permission to do things your way! 

My 2 week old daughter just pooped on my shirt as I type this in bed 

So time for me to go

But one last thing

If you put all your focus and energy into improving your skills 

Skills which allow you to give incredibly generous work in between “action” and “cut”

Everything will take care of itself

Eventually

Your tapes will find their way to the surface

Your auditions will make their way through the fire walls

Your behaviour on set will be spoken about behind closed doors

And those agents will chase you

Because they see you are are focussed on what’s most important

Contributing good work

So

Always 

Bring it back to the work

The craft of acting

Just get so good they can’t ignore you

(But still hang out with people you like)

Hope this helps 

X

Fish Skeletons

Let’s pretend 

I am a teacher

And you are a student 

In a class full of artists 

I’m going to hand each one of you

A piece of paper

Not just any piece of paper

A piece of paper with a skeleton of a fish on it

Great

So everyone has a skeleton of a fish

Next

I dump hundreds of crayons & coloured pencils in the middle of the room

Every colour you could possibly imagine 

And I ask you to colour in that fish 

Anyway you like

Have a blast 

Do whatever you want!

Twenty minutes later

We have a show-and-tell

Little Billy has made a blue fish with spiky fins and big red eyes

Jumping Jack has created a happy looking rainbow fish with huge goofy teeth

Winnie has drawn a very calm looking purple fish which almost looks eerie

Levi has made a fish with all kinds of spindly looking extensions

Scarlett’s fish is upside down and signing a song

Mackenzie’s fish is striped like a zebra 

The list goes on

So

Everyone got the same skeleton

The same structure

But everyone had the freedom to flesh it out in their own way

And what we got was a bunch of unique fish

One-of-a-kind 

But they were all still fish

Mmm 

Acting 

Everyone is given the same structure

But everyone is given the freedom to flesh it out in their own way

Structure equals freedom

Am I adhering to the structure that this project requires? 

Or am I just doing something which doesn’t actually serve the story?

And

Am I able to flesh it out in my own way?

Or am I just creating the fish I think I should in order to please everyone else?

It’s a hell of balancing act

And one which will keep us busy right up until the end

Serve the structure

Flesh it out in your own way

Hope this helps 

X

Punching Walls

Many years ago

I was cast as a main role in a TV show

I was elated

Rolling onto my third job in a row

Which meant I was finally feeling like a professional working actor

Flying around the world

Jobs overlapping

Wonderful writing

Intense characters

Cool accomodation

I just felt like I was in the arena

I felt like I was home

Details about the next job started to come in

Days required

Costume & hair

Top secret scripts sent to my house

The fun stuff

The cast was magnificent

We even had a big international actor coming in from overseas

Who I quickly realised, most of my scenes in the show were going to be filmed with

I felt giddy

But immediately began to feel a creeping sense of pressure

I felt it necessary to make an effort early on

We were going to have a lot of big and uncomfortable scenes together

So I thought it paramount to build a strong sense of trust from the get go

We had a superb first day

We checked in before stepping into a very difficult scene

And then found a wonderful sense of flow during a big conversation in front of the lens

We ended the day with a hug

We expressed a healthy dose of gratitude and excitement at the work to come

And then went on our ways

They were going to step into a heavy two weeks of solo scenes

And I was heading to NZ to shoot another series

The sun settled with a sense harmony

When I returned to Australia a few weeks later

We jumped right into a solid 5 weeks straight of filming

Having a lot of time off during a job is sometimes a tricky thing

Like with any group of people over time

Routines, rituals and connections tend to grow and find their own rhythm

And stepping into that can feel a bit confusing and clumsy sometimes

Like trying to figure out where you fit in the pack

It became immediately apparent

This international actor had a way they liked to do things

And that this way had been allowed to normalise on set

Alright

Fair enough

They are the protagonist after all

And there was certainly a larger weight on their shoulders than there was on mine

And despite my body feeling a sense of dissonance

I remained stoic and told myself

“I can work with anyone”

And then…

Time started to play its part

Like a little drop of water on the forehead

Over and over again

The repetitiveness started to worm itself into my temper

Not only mine

Many of the creatives were struggling

At one point I remember even the director stating to this actor

“Well whatever you want to do with this scene let’s just do that,

Because we are going to have to reshoot it any way if you don’t like it”

Ouch

Things were getting tough of set

If I could boil it down to one feeling

Control

People were feeling controlled

By one individual

Like they had to do things in a particular way otherwise that one person would take issue

Producers were getting their daily emails each night from this individual

Actors were being told what choices to make

Directors were being told how to direct scenes

Tensions were rising

And I swallowed it all

I grit my teeth

I smiled politely

And a deep frustration started to boil under my skin

Basic one-oh-ones were not being respected

If there was one thing thing I had not experienced on set up to that point

It was one actor telling another how to do their job

I found this really hard to manage

I felt confused

Lost

Angry

If I’m not telling others how to do their job

Why am I being told how to do mine?

Quiet, Mike

Smile

Now…

If all the notes had actually improved everyones work then maybe my thoughts would have been different

Maybe I would have felt like there was a genius on set who was drastically improving the show

But at this point I had over a decade of experience

I had been on set with several Oscar winners

And I felt like I had somewhat of an idea of things

So to me

When I heard the constant controlling notes each day

None of them really made sense

Truth be told

I didn’t think the calibre of their skill set warranted telling other actors, producers and directors what they should do

But there I was

Trying to manage giving my own work

But feeling like I should please the other actor I was working with

Quiet, Mike

Smile

Enter a helpful quote…

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die”

I kept drinking the poison

To the point where it was painful to go to set

Quiet, Mike

Smile

Smile

Then one day

(Which happened to be the second last day of filming)

I just had enough

Ironically

We were shooting a fiery scene

Where my character was having enough of this other actors character

The notes began reigning in

“I think you should do it like this”

“I don’t think your character would do that”

Yikes

One too many times of feeling like I was being controlled

Feeling like I was suffocating

Feeling like I was compromising my work in order to avoid conflict

I felt hot

Dark

I looked at the director and asked

“Could we please have another rehearsal?”

They said

“Of course. And action”

I waited

I waited for my moment

And then I put my fist through a wall

Please take note - this was a location shoot

Not a pre-made set

So I just punched a hole in someone else’s wall in their kitchen

Yep

Everything went quiet

The actor fumbled their lines

They seemed rattled

But we made it through the scene

And then after…

I immediately brought my hand to my chin and said

“Mmm, I’m not sure that works”

The director agreed

“Yes that might be a bit too much, but I loved the offer,

Let’s go take care of hair & make up and come back in to shoot”

The other actor was quiet

For the first time in weeks

They had nothing to say

I walked out

One of the crew looked at me with a big smile and whispered

“you’re so explosive, I love watching your work”

I gently thanked him

But I felt heavy

Very heavy

I knew the truth

There is zero excuse for 3 things on set

Hurting people

Damaging property

And wasting time

None

Absolutely none

And I violated that

I damaged the set

And I hid it under the guise of artistic exploration

But I knew deep down what really happened

The problem is almost never the problem

If you trace the problem back

You can usually find the small turning point

Add time

And that small bit of dissonance grows into a monster

Where was the turning point for me?

Several weeks before

My body knew something wasn’t okay for me

That was my opportunity

To let my body lead

Take a breath

And say

“Hey… I’m just struggling a bit”

But I chose to swallow it

To please

To avoid small conflict

And thus, let it grow into an unhealthy monster

It was an interesting last two days on set

I reached out to my coach who guided me through the moment kindly & slowly

But to this day I still feel remorseful about

Something very important did come from that day

I had a realisation…

Like any professional environment

I don’t have to be liked by everyone at work

It’s okay

I can rock up to set

Try give good work

Honestly & respectfully

And go home to my family and friends

What's my point...

Permission to let things be professional

Especially if that means saying

“Hey, I’m struggling a bit”

Early

And vulnerably

Hope this helps

X

Moment Before

Guiding the new crop of NIDA grads over the last two months has been… glorious

I have watched them develop & gain more screen craft specifically in the last three weeks

Than my NIDA year group did over their full three years (back in 2010)

The secret?

They have been practicing being on set

Without actually being on set

Replicating the on-set processes

And taking the time to slow down, make mistakes and debrief afterwards

They have been thrown in the deep end

And have quickly realised that what is most valuable in a self tape format

Doesn’t necessarily translate to what’s most valued on set

I have adored watching their growth

One of my favourite moments

Has been our weekly Monday debriefs

We sit down

We analyse the footage

We identify the strengths (what’s working well)

And we identify the most important areas for improvement.

At the end of one class

A student asked me

“What are you seeing that’s working well for us?”

My answer?

“Three key things

One

When I see you focussing on breathing as yourselves, I see better work

Two

When I see you using the questions in the text to simply ask the person standing in front of you that question, I see better work

And three

When I see you taking responsibility for the moment before, I absolutely am seeing better work

Let’s discuss

Breath

You are the most valuable currency you have in this industry

Not who you think or feel you should be

And the key to getting good at giving yourself to the lens

Is to practice

Literally practice breathing in front of the lens

So much of generic acting training is about stretching young artists to their full light (love) or full darkness (fear)

Which results in plenty of pushed shouts and cries

And tension in the artist = tension in the audience

It’s icky

And more importantly

When you watch any performance that you love

Those extremes usually only make up a tiny fraction (lets call it 2-5%) of the protagonists journey

The majority of the work which is required in order to get to those scenes where you release those extremes

Is made up of simply breathing, listening and having honest conversations

So why is the majority of generic acting training focussed on the tiny 2-5% of screen craft?

Well

It’s damn more interesting to stand a kid up in class and make them cry in front of everyone than it is to practice breathing.

But my focus is to make actors actually get better, so they can give the most generous work they can when it counts most.

A pivotal moment in my own growth

Was when I realised I was trying to do incredibly complex things

And trying to achieve gigantic results

At a time when I couldn’t even breathe as myself in front of the lens under pressure

It took a lot of effort to flip the equation around

To understand that pros do less, better

Let’s clarify

As a professional working artist

You won’t get employed consistently to release those extremes of light and darkness

Until you are technically able to consistently breathe as yourself in front of the lens under pressure

So focus your training on getting great at what is actually most valuable

Breathing as you.

Next.

Questions.

Almost every scene you do will have a question in it as some point.

Some text with a question-mark after it

I can hear the great Kevin Jackson in my head right now

“THE WRITER IS GOD”

Over and over again

I see young artists treat question-marks as if they are full-stops, commas or ellipses.

They are not

They are question-marks

And they are their for a reason

It means one human being is standing in front of another

Asking them for some information

Which they don’t know the answer to

Information which carries repercussions

Information which can change their life

I know this is something very simple

But it’s almost like a cheat code in acting

A technical way of jumping back into the present

And a present actor is bloody delicious to watch

Simply ask the person standing in front of you that question

That one action will take care of the majority of the work required in that moment

So

When there is a question-mark

Ask the question.

Next.

Moment Before.

At some point

Hundreds of extras and crew will stop what they are doing

Everyone will look at you

And there will be silence

You will hear the words:

“Final checks”

The hair and costume department will scurry around you and start trying to make your hair and clothes look identical to the take before

When the checks are completed

The first AD will say:

“Quiet on set”

The camera and sound department will then confirm they are ready to go

“Camera’s rolling”

“Speed”

Someone with a clapping board will then go between you and the lens

And say a few words which will help the editor in several days, weeks or months time with the organisation of this take

And then

The director will say

“Action”

Yikes

What a time

The moment before you are to give your best work

Is FILLED with chaos

So much possibility for distraction, head noise, fear

This moment in time

In between “final checks” & “action”

Roughly speaking

This is usually between 10-60 seconds

This is your moment to focus

You have done all of that preparation

Spent hours working on this scene

Spent hours warmup up

Spent hours travelling to set

Spent hours In hair and makeup

Spent hours waiting in the trailer

It would be a shame

To do all of that work

To then throw it all away because of the chaos that comes just before your take

Everyone else is getting paid take ownership of their work

So take ownership of yours

In those 10-60 seconds

What do you need to do

To get where you need to get

So you can give what you need to give

So can contribute the work you want to to the tribe

Clarify the one or two most important things for you to do in that moment before

Clarify what you need to take care of in that time

So you can simply release your work on cue

Remember

It’s more valuable and sustainable for the camera to simply catch you living

Than it is for you to manufacture effort or boil up fake energy on the word “action”

Make it easy for yourself :)

The goal is not pushed/controlled effort

The goal is free flowing self expression

Hope this helps

X

Career Architecture

A systematic approach to building your career, your way…

One: Secret Sauce

Get clear about what is the most generous thing you can contribute to the audience, separating you from the rest.

Two: Harbour

Clarify what you honestly want to begin working towards.

Three: Choices

Get clear about the behaviour, sacrifices, actions, habits, rituals, hard conversations & decisions you will have to make in order to allow what you honestly want to come to you. Choose which are most important.

Four: Relationships

Agents, managers, coaches & colleagues. Who are the people you are building your career with? How do you create & take care of those connections so you end up with energising, fulfilling and sustainable relationships?

Five: Pressure

Confidence will come from developing physical skills under pressure. Create a process for finding comfort in the chaos.

Six: Waiting

Can you wait well in an uncertain industry? The majority of acting is waiting (for the next audition, job, scene, take, etc). Are you living the way you want regardless of external factors taking time?

Seven: Practice

Are you practicing in a way which allows you to actually get better at the skillset you need in order to move you forward? Clarify, plan, execute, debrief.

Eight: Opportunities

Are you getting access to the opportunities you actually want? What do you need to change in order to increase those opportunities?

Nine: Game Plan

You go the job. Great! Now what? Are you doing what you need to do, in order to get where you need to get, so you can give what you need to give? Prepare in a way which allows you to give your best, on command, from the first day to the last.

Ten: Game Day

Are you leaving work and placing your head on the pillow feeling filled, knowing you gave what you wanted to give? Create a clear & honest plan which allows you to give your all when it counts most.

Done.

Hope this helps

X

Rejection

I’m driving home

It’s evening

The sky is orange and quiet

I pass over the lagoon

The coots are snickering amongst themselves

It’s cold

I want to get in the water

Chase them like I did as a kid

My father once told me

If I pour salt on a Guineafowls’ tail

It will become immobilised

Then I can pick it up and pat it

Thus

Many family holidays were spent with a salt shaker in hand

Running after confused birds in the Drakensberg mountains of KwaZulu-Natal

KwaZulu

Zulu

Meaning “Sky / heaven”

I ran in heaven

With a salt shaker…

My phone rings

Breaking me out of one of my many day dreams

I see the caller

“Nixxx”

My agent

My heart flutters

I know what this is about

I take a breath

Press the button and say

“Hi Nixxxie”

(Her name has recently changed from “Nixxx” to “Nixxxie” since becoming a grandmother)

I hear her voice for the first time this week

“Hello”

Oh god

There it is

Her tone

I know

My body knows immediately

It hasn’t gone my way

I take another breath

Remind my body to give up any tension

Let go buddy

We begin talking about everything other than what is actually happening

The weather

How my fiancé’s bun in the oven is cooking

Do we have everything ready in the nursery

Etc

Then it comes

Nixie takes a breath

“Mike, I really thought it was going to be a yes on this one, I’m so sorry, it didn’t go your way”

“I know Nix, I know…”

I reply

She can hear my disappointment

It’s been a while since I really wanted an acting gig

She tries to cheer me up

“I cannot, for the life of me, find fault in your tape

The work is all there, the team loves you

There’s just obviously other factors”

I smile

I appreciate her warm tone and the care she is giving me in this moment

“Thanks Nix”

Then there is silence

We sit in it

She’s good at letting me take my time

I feel the urge to put on a happy tone

No

Give up buddy

“This one hurts Nixxxie”

She leans in with me

There’s no false happy pep talk

There’s no trying to pretend it doesn’t suck

We let it hurt

Ten minutes later

I say “thank you for listening”

We give our love

And say our goodbyes

And I keep driving

I go quiet

Breathe

Breathe

A year of great screen work just vanished in front of me

Breathe

I feel stupid

I let myself get excited about this one

Damnit!

I shouldn’t have done that!

The shoulds begin

What’s my partner going to think?

Is she going to be upset? Sad for me?

I don’t want to bring her down

What are my parents going to think?

Other people’s voices are coming in hot

The head noise is swirling now

Bring it back to the body

Breathe

Breathe

This is where I am at

Accept it mike

Mmm

I don’t want to accept it

Now I’m getting angry

Fuck them

Their loss

Yep

Really protecting myself now

God my body is good at trying to take care of me

But I’m noticing it

I know this place

I entered the professional industry at 16

I have 18 years of experience here

It’s okay buddy

Slow and kind

You know the way

Go be honest

I feel the urge to drive faster

So I deliberately take my foot off the accelerator

I slow down

But its hard

I don’t want to surrender

It’s scary to surrender

I pull up in front of the house

“Always” by Blink182 finishes playing

God

Life is grey (the opposite of black and white)

I sit in the car

Not sure what to do

I get a text

“Look out the window”

My fiancé is pressed up against the glass of our big lounge room window

Smiling

I can see my first son or daughter cocooned in her belly

Ugh

She is so happy to have me home

I want to hide

I don’t want to tell her

I know how she’ll respond

She’ll go slow

She’ll be kind

She’ll hold me

I don’t want her to have to do that

Not again

Not again

I just want to come home with a win

Honey

I got it

I got the job

I’m taking you and JT out to dinner tonight

$100 steaks are on me!

JT is code name for Jelly Tot

The nickname of our unborn child

I look at her smiling in the window

She begins wagging

Almost like a husky when it’s beyond excited

Mike

Just go be honest

I smile back

Go surrender

I tell myself

She greets me at the door

I wrap her up

“Can we do shnugs?”

I ask

There is no hesitation

Straight to bed we go

We wrap ourselves up together in a big puffy doona

Like two cosie eskimos

All goes still

The house is quiet after a long day

She whispers

“Jt has been kicking sooo much today”

“Has he really”

I say, as I place my hand on him

Or her

(But we are 90% sure it’s a boy)

I feel him

It’s like he has moments where we does somersaults non stop

I’m reminded of the chaos coming

I smile

I breathe in my family

I open my eyes

I look at her

She knows something is up

With trepidation

I say

“I just got the call”

She looks confused for a second

Then immediately realises what I’m referring to

No hesitation

She swallows me up

And holds me

We lie together

In silence

While I breathe

Deep and slow

Eventually

She asks

“What do you need right now?”

I look at her

And I suddenly feel clear

I use to fight these moments

Hard

Try show the world that I’m okay

Try show the industry that I’m not upset

That I’m a good actor who keeps going

But after almost 2 decades of practice

I know what’s best for me right now

I smile at her

And step off the ledge

“I just need to let myself be upset

To let it hurt

To know that that’s okay”

...

Hope this helps

X

Cheap Effective Practice

In 2016

I started the year off with a bang

I was onstage at the Sydney Opera House

Working for Australia’s premier theatre company

Working on a play I adored (Arcadia)

By one of my favourite writers (Stoppard)

And playing a character I loved (Valentine)

The cast was insanely talented

The director was one of those directors that theatre actors both feared and dreamed of working with

And I had an incredible coach supporting me the whole time

It was a gorgeous period of my life

I needed it

My previous theatre experience had been marred

And I deeply wanted to turn the ship around on this one

So when opening night came

And I gave the work I wanted to

Plus was kind to myself when I slipped up

Plus had fun with great actors

Man

I put my head on the pillow and fell asleep pretty damn easily

But as wonderful as it all was…

I had an itch

It was small at first

But after about 45 shows

I remember really wanting to scratch it

The itch was screen acting

At that time

I had spent over a decade working on theatre

And there was a seed underneath my skin desperate to grow

So when the next theatre audition came through

I decided to listen to my body and say “no” in order to create space for a “yes”

First things first

I was pretty clear about the direction I wanted to head

I simply looked at all the scenes, actors, films that inspired me

What was the most important common denominator?

They all gave honest conversations on screen

That’s what I wanted to give

But how?

I felt there was a massive valley in between my current skill level and where I wanted to be

So the time came

Where I realised

The most important thing I could do

In order to increase my skill level on screen

Was reps

Reps reps reps

Cold hard time in front of the lens

Okay

How can I get reps?

A huge reason why acting is still important to this day

Is because we represent one of the key ingredients that allowed us to survive the last 200 000 years

Connection

Human connection

Therefore

We need others to practice

We need to sit opposite someone else and have a human connection with them in front of the lens

Now, at that time

I allocated a little bit of my piggy bank for training each month

But that was one night a week

And based off the books I was reading at the time

I knew that for actual skill development

I would benefit exponentially from 2-3 shorter sessions per week

Rather than one intense weekend workshop

Okay

2-3 shorter practice sessions per week

So, find somebody and practice

But who?

And where?

And for how long?

And do what, specifically?

This created a jam for me

The years after graduating NIDA

I can remember practicing or filming self tapes was a miserable affair

Often spending long hours doing take after take

Just slogging it out trying to make each line perfect

Repeating takes because I made one duff up

Or the practice time would be continually interrupted by phones

Or the other person would spend hours complaining about things outside of their control (the industry)

Or the lighting setup was terrible

Or my technical computer skills would mean everything electronic I touched instantaneously fell apart

Exhausting and frustrating

Simply de-energising

My experience practicing had been tainted

I wanted to be a bit smarter this time

So I tried something different

Energising Practice (30/45/45)

One

Find someone you feel energised around

Someone who’s curious, kind, honest, dedicated, respectful, open etc

Whatever floats your boat

Someone you resonate with

Someone your body says “hell yes” to.

Someone you feel excited about showing up to play with.

(If they ain’t energising, it ain’t gonna be sustainable)

Two

Book the time, place & setup

Wednesday at 14:00-16:00 at mine

A clear time

A clear place (where you can do deep work for 2 hours without getting distracted)

A clear step - good lighting/camera

Three

Show up

Phones on aeroplane mode

Put the timer on

30 minutes

Then check in

Include coffee and shnacks :)

Have a chat about what you both want out of your 45

How would you like to feel after practice?

What will you focus on to help you get three?

What’s the most important thing you would like to work on in the next 45?

And what the process that will help you improve it?

Four

Deep work

Each actor then gets 45 minutes

And which ever actor goes first

The other actor is there to wholeheartedly support and serve the actor on screen

Five

The debrief

In the last few minutes of your 45

Identify two things

Best Thing: What was the best thing about your practice? What did you feel good about, what worked? What do you think you did well?

(I don’t care how much you want to say “it all sucked and I’m terrible at acting”… try be objective and find something worth celebrating)

Ready For: What are you ready to work on next?

Where is the 1% improvement you are ready to work on next?

That’s it.

Doneskies!

30/45/45

Energising practice

Remember

If you can make things like practice, self taping, learning lines, etc

(The boring bits)

If you can make them energising

Addictive

Fun

You’ll want to keep going

And if you keep showing up

And keep making 1% improvement

Week after week

Month after month

Year after year

You’ll be bloody dangerous as an actor

Hope this helps

X

What Actually Works

“Pros do less, better”

In an ocean of techniques

There are a small handful 

Which will work for the majority of people

& in the majority of circumstances

So if you only have so much time and energy 

Only so much attention to give to your craft

Those few things are really worth focussing on

Of course

We want to maintain interest, follow curiosities and expand our boundaries of what we think is possible

But at the end of the day

The same old basics are what’s going to be left when working under pressure

So in that call back

Or on that big budget set

When nerves start kicking in

We want to have a strong foundation of things we can rely on

Which actually work

So we can keep playing and giving the work we want to 

On demand

Over and over again.

So which few things are actually worth focussing on?

Which few things are most worth getting better at?

I was at the whiteboard the other day

With a class of NIDA students 

We wrote as many different things on the board as we could think of

In terms of where we could allocate our time and energy in prepping for a scene

We let rip

Threw it all out there

Everything from Michael Chekov’s psychological gesture

To animal work

To Meisner’s repetition 

To objectives & obstacles 

Slowly we made our way through the hundreds of possibilities

Distilling what is almost always going to be there when we need it under pressure

You know what was left?

Breathing

Moving (getting out of the head & into the body before a take)

Giving the camera access to your eyes 

Learning lines

Yup 

That was it

Hundreds of options

But only a teeny weeny few that you can almost always rely on when acting on screen

Take a moment to imagine…

If you employed Pareto’s principle

And spent 80% of your practice time on:

Breathing as yourself in front of the lens

Moving out of your head and into your body before every take

Giving the camera access to your eyes

And finding a joyful process for learning lines

And then multiplied that over time

6 weeks… 6 months… A year…

What the results would be?

Yup

Exponential growth 

It almost sounds deceptive doesn’t it

Too easy

Too boring

Too weird and out there

But I beg to differ

If you are someone who does what everyone else is doing and expects a different result

Then this might be for you 

Over the next few weeks I am going to dive into these fundamentals 

(Including a story about Mel Gibson teaching me how not to be a bad actor)

And explain why investing your time & energy into these delicious “boring basics”

Might be the best use of energy you give to your craft this year

Regardless of your skill level 

Hope this helps 

X 

Don’t Count Yourself Out

I know an actress

For privacy’s sake

Let’s call her Grace

Grace works hard

She’s kind to people

And she keeps going

Last week

Grace was cast in one of the biggest shows to be made in recent history

Writing, budget, cast, role, producers, director, etc

Grace just caught a very big fish

A fish that most other actors dream about catching

This was a personal triumph for Grace

She is elated about the upcoming process

But there’s a bit more to this story

Because on the face of it

It would seem that committing to the audition (self tape) several weeks ago

Grace was facing an daunting task

One that others might have deem as delusional

You see

Over the last few years

Grace has given about 60 self tapes

And she hasn’t gotten a single one

So, on the surface

It would seem the industry has it in for Grace

60 auditions

No results to show

This leads us to an important lesson

The results alone never tell the whole story

Roughly speaking

Other artists, the industry, the public

They only remember the results

Who got the role ?

Who do we see on the screen, billboard, gram etc ?

By that logic

Grace didn’t stand a chance

She was 0-60

However

Let’s look a bit closer

Out of those 60 self tapes, Grace had 7 call backs

Out of those 7 call backs, Grace had been put “on hold” for 3

Out of those 3 jobs, Grace adored two of the roles and really hoped to get them

One of those roles was for a job which turned out to be one of the biggest grossing films of 2019

The other was a role opposite one of Grace’s acting heroes

So

Grace had been close to landing great work before

But that’s not all

Two out of the big six casting directors in Australia adored Grace

They believed she consistently gave generous, authentic work

They found her to be passionate, respectable, on time and kind

On top of this

Despite the lack of results

Her agent kept putting her up for auditions

Her agent, who has been in the industry for over 30 years

Believed that if Grace just kept going and kept giving

Something would transpire

Adding to this

Grace caught the attention of two producers who championed her and got her in for multiple auditions

In those cases

There simply wasn’t a great match with the writing and other actresses landed those jobs

Furthermore

Grace heads to class once a week with a teacher who takes care of two other professional actresses whom Grace admires

The teacher and Grace would sit and debrief her tapes privately to find out what she was doing really well

And where (specifically and tangibly) she could make one percent improvement each week

Grace also had a few student short films under her belt which she used to make a little showreel

And when showing it to trusted colleagues in the biz

They replied “this is beautiful work, you must keep giving your work to this world”

Again

The results don’t always tell the whole story

The work ethic, the colleagues, the mentors, the practice, the progression of craft

This tells a very different story as opposed to the 0-60

Curious

Which story are you choosing to give your attention to?

What’s my point...

Don’t count yourself out based on past results alone

Often the truth is more nuanced than a simple “I didn’t get the role”

Try (as hard as it can sometimes feel) to zoom out

And make your assessment on the whole picture

Because

Often times

Despite what others (who are not in the arena) are gobbling on about

You’ll see you’ve got a better chance than many believe

Hope this helps

X

Take Your Time

Sometimes

I get pretty damn scared when I don’t have acting work 

Familiar thoughts tend to raise their head again 

Will I ever work again?

Does anybody want me?

Am I actually good at this thing I’ve been working so hard at?

Have people worked out that I’m a complete fraud?

Can everybody else see that I don’t have any idea what I’m doing?

Am I going to wake up after dedicating decades of my life to something and realise that it was all a waste of time?

Wow

Give it an inch

And my imagination will take a mile!

Okay

Let’s not give my imagination permission to run away here

Curious 

If I zoom out in this moment

And look at those sentences

I notice something

In the decades I’ve spent researching, reading and listening

I know

That I’m not alone

I know

Not only do my friends and colleagues share similar thoughts and feelings

But my heroes do too!

I remember a time

Back in the drama school days

When Al Pacino came to have a chat to us wee graduates

One of my best friends 

(Who was an insane Al Pacino fan)

Asked him 

“There was a time 

After you had done your first few films

When you didn’t work for two years

If you could go back now

What advice would you offer to that young version of yourself during that down time?”

Al Pacino took a long look at my friend

Breathed deep

Smiled 

And said

“I would rest my hand on his shoulder and say:

It’s okay,

You will get laid”

I love this

And I think Al is talking about one of the most important fundamentals someone can develop in their work

Let me explain 

I have been incredibly lucky to be on set with some extraordinary actors

Dicaprio, Mcguire, Green, Mulligan, Egerton, Gibson, Garfield bla bla bla  (name dropsss)

And there is something I have noticed in all of them

They do it slower

What do I mean by slower?

They take their time

They are willing to allow more time for themselves to achieve things they desire deeply

Not only have I noticed this across top actors

But it’s there all across the performance world too

Look at anyone who is at the top of their field

They give better work by going slower

Tennis for example 

The difference between good professional players and the stand-out champions of the game?

It's proven that champions take just a little bit more time to fully recover between points

They ask for the towel to rub down, even if not strictly necessary, or take a few seconds extra on ball selection

This energy management or reset allows them to maintain performance in a longer match and leads to a method for deep recovery between points

Point is… the best take longer to do things they deem important 

Athletes, CEO’s, Artists…

They slow down their work in order to give more

(Even if just by a small percentage)

As I’m typing this I just noticed the amazon delivery guy in my street

He has thrown something in a mail box, rushed out of the street, only to return two minutes later to another mail box a few houses down

Literally three times!

If he was to slow down

Take 10 seconds to look at the black swan floating in the lagoon 

Take 7 seconds to smell the lingering scent of fresh fallen rain

Take 20 seconds to look at his next few deliveries

He could go for a slow walk, make 3 deliveries in 4 minutes and give himself an extra ten to get to his next suburb 

But what about time?

Time waits for no one!

Only so many hours in the day right!?

Push push push

Rush rush rush

Must achieve this goal but that time otherwise I’m a failure!

Yup

Fear causes me to rush

To push

To use force

This equals tension

And tension equals shoulding

So I end up doing what I “should” do

Saying what I “should” say

Typing what I “should” type

But what I know

Is that I, Michael

Like every other individual on this earth

Have my very own timezone

A timezone that is completely unique to me

It’s Michael Sheasby’s time zone

My body knows how to breathe, how to walk, how to move at it’s own harmonious pace

A pace that happens when I’m not shoulding out of fear

When I’m not trying to please others

When I’m not trying to achieve things by a certain time or a particular age 

Mmm 

So

How can I make this more doable?

More practical?

Here’s some ideas

When noticing you’re walking at a pace which is not yours

When rushing in traffic

When rushing across the pedestrian crossing

When ordering coffee

When standing up in acting class to do your scene

When in between takes on set during your close up

When in between takes in the casting room

When giving yourself a deadline to achieve a particular goal by a particular time

When having a difficult conversation...

Stop

Take a breath

Bring it back to your own timezone

Listen to your body

Let it lead

The body knows 

Millions of years of evolution, right there, ready to take care of you

What’s my point?

Take your time

Give yourself permission to be in your timezone 

Hope this helps

X 

The Best Advice

I’m taking care of the NIDA grads over the next 3 months

So my brain is once again shifting from my own work to:

“how can I help these performers progress best?”

It is therefore important for me 

Being on the other side of the curtain 

To be clear about what’s most worth investing valuable time and resources in

So

Let’s get clear

What is the best advice I can give to an actor right now?

Focus on being the best

And everything else will take care of itself.

What do I mean?

There are many things in combination that can help build a sustainable career

Kindess

Agents

Social media 

Networking 

Etc

However…

Kindness alone won’t build a sustainable career for you

Agents alone won’t build a sustainable career for you

Social media and networking alone won’t build a sustainable career for you

At the end of the day

At some point 

On set or in the casting room

Everything will go quiet 

Everyone will stop what they are doing and look at you 

A camera will be pointed on your face

And Someone will say 

“Action”

If…

In this moment…

You are able to give your best work

Your most generous work 

The career will build itself

The work will come

The money will flow

Agents will beat down your door

Lovely relationships with great colleagues will develop 

Companies will fight for you to wear there clothes

Social media followers will frantically click buttons

You get the point

Acting skills

Your ability to actually act on cue

Your ability to give your most generous work in between “action” and “cut”

This is the thing worth focussing on most

It’s been said before: 

“Be so good they can’t ignore you” 

And I really do think we inherently know this

But it’s easy enough to just say “be really great at acting”

Much harder to turn this into an actionable process 

There are teachers all around the world

Classes running late into the night

Many decade-old acting books being combed through

All giving their two cents on how to get better

But how the hell do we know what to actually focus on?

Well

This is where individual choice comes in

Theatre?

Screen?

Improv?

Distinct characters?

Supporting roles?

Superheros? 

Simply put… 

What floats your boat?

What energises you beyond words?

What do you go to bed dreaming about?

What makes you forget to eat? Not need to sleep?

Who inspires you?

Who makes you insanely jealous?

What’s the kind of work that makes you go “HELL YES!”?

For me?

When helping other actors 

I have a heavy bias toward leading roles on screen 

So for today

Let’s go down that rabbit hole

Let’s just pretend that you want to get as good as you possibly can at playing leading roles on screen

Well

What skills does one need to get good at in order to give leading role calibre work?

There are three main areas one needs to become proficient at in order to give leading role level work

ONE: Darkness - Ownership of fear, your shadow, all parts of yourself that you judge as “bad” or “wrong”. Can you channel this and allow pure fear to flow out of you on demand?

TWO: Light - Ownership of love, vulnerability, all parts of yourself that requires you to surrender to the human standing opposite you. Can you channel this and allow pure love to flow out of you on demand?

So we have darkness and light

Light and darkness

The “boy and the beast”, so to speak

These are two out of the three main areas

A heavy amount of training steers in the direction of these two skills

Many a class have I sat in until the early hours of the morning (literally) 

Watching teachers push and pull actors into the extremities of these two areas 

But

Time to ask an important question

When watching lead roles on screen

In any film or show

How often do we see these two parts released?

Exactly

The majority of training focusses on pushing and pulling actors toward releasing darkness and light

Fear and love

Yet

These areas make up a small minority when it comes to professional work on screen

Interesting to note the majority of training is focussing on the minority of skill set actually required in ones career!

This leads us to our third area required for leading on screen

In order for actors to earn the audiences support when releasing darkness and light

They need to spend the majority of the job doing what I believe to be the most under-utilised area in training

THREE: Breathing as one’s self 

The vast majority of what you will be asked to do in terms of acting on screen

Will be breathing as yourself in front of the lens

This will make up 95% or more of your professional work

If you can do this well

You will be asked to release the other two main areas

But if you can’t breathe as yourself in front of the lens

Chance are you won’t be consistently asked to release the darkness and the light

So if breathing as yourself is so bloody important

Why do acting classes focus so heavily on the screaming and the crying?

Well

Because it’s more interesting

It makes people feel like they are progressing way more than breathing does

For a teacher to hold a students hand, ask them to close their eyes and drudge up all their childhood woes…

Yeah there’s gonna be some tears and people will applaud and everyone goes home feeling buzzed

But will the teacher be there to help the actor get to that same place tomorrow on set?

Nope

It’s a short term win

And as great as short term wins can feel

I’m most curious about the long term work

The boring stuff which no-one what’s to focus on

Persistence...

To rock up to class or practice 

Week after week

And focus on breathing as ones self on screen

That takes discipline

That’s boring as heck

So of course people aren’t going to do that

But back to what’s most valuable

The people who are on set

Getting paid to lead shows and films around the world

They are getting paid more than anyone because they can do the thing that so few can

Breathe as them-self 

So back to my initial question

What is the best advice I can give to an actor?

If you are wanting to give leading work on screen

Then focus on getting as good as you can at breathing as yourself in front of the lens

Do this

Invest in this

And everything else will take care of itself 

I really hope this helps 

X 

Time in the Saddle

Once upon a time

I was packing my bag

Ready to travel to India for a film

I was ecstatic 

It was the end of my first year out of drama school and I felt a real sense of momentum building

My bag was open on the floor with a few of the essentials already in it

I was simply waiting for that final phone call to confirm the last minute details before finishing packing

I got the opposite kind of call 

My agent rang with a gentle, slow and apologetic tone

“It didn’t come together I’m afraid”

I was devastated

One year out into the industry meant I still got very wobbly when it came to rejections

Probably something to do with the fact that I use to spend an enormous amount of time focussing on what decision the producers would make rather than focussing on what I could control - understandably!

Anywho

I was sad

So I packed up my fly fishing gear and some spare clothes and headed to the mountains

Eight hours later I was in a hostel room alone

Apparently no-one wants to go to the ski fields when there isn’t snow?

I got dressed into my waders, put on all the gear that made me look like I knew what I was doing when I actually didn’t

And stood in the snowmelt-temperature river trying to catch a trout

One thing I love about getting back into nature

Is that it doesn’t take much time for me to be coaxed back into the present 

I can remember seeing some kind of floating rodent pop up about 10 feet away from me

I grew up in Africa with very different wildlife

So when I saw my first wild Platypus I really didn’t know what to make of it

No fish, but one Platypus, still a big win

I decided to call it a day and head back to my empty hostel to eat alone

On my way home

There was a sign outside an equestrian centre

“Buck Brannaman Horsemanship Clinic - $50 to watch)

Huh?

Obviously I turned into the drive way 

And poked my head into the big barn

The next thing I knew

I was sitting on a fence for the next 3 days straight

Watching the world’s leading horse whisperer work with horses

This is the man the author of “The Horse Whisperer” used as inspiration for his novel

And who’s documentary (Buck) won Sundance back in 2010

It was one of the most wonderful few days of my life

And certainly one of the greatest craft experiences I have ever had

Everything Buck was talking about

I thought remarkably related to acting

I felt like I was home

I knew that horses cost a lot of money

And required a tonne of land, time, and effort

But I remember feeling like I had found one of the most meaningful things in my life

Still

To this day

I know

Deep down

Getting good at riding horses 

Is one of the most worthwhile things I could do with my time on this earth

(Stick with me here)

A year later

I was cast in my first series

I got the role of the antagonist for the first season of a new network show

Set in the 50’s

And guess what!?

This meant horses!

As each episode was sent to me in the mail

I would snatch it out of the mailman’s poor hands

Dive into bed 

And flick through to find when I would be required to showoff some horse skills

That page never came

Turns out I was the only character in the show to NOT ride a horse

I had a beat up old pickup truck instead (ugh… how many times I stalled that thing during takes) 

I was frustrated

But not phased

I looked up who the horse wrangler was

The extraordinary Graham Ware Jr. 

Four generations of horse wrangling for film & TV

The very man who worked with Viggo on Lord of The Rings

Yes!

I found his number and called him up

Everyone got horse riding lessons with him except me

But I was happy to fork out for my own private lessons

I just wanted to get better at this beautiful craft

Graham listened patiently and invited me to his farm

Off I went

Brand new RM’s ready to get muddy

The lessons began

I had ridden horses every Wednesday afternoon growing up as a kid thanks to my Mother’s patience & generosity

But a decade later… 

I had some tuning up to do

I was hungry & determined

Everything Graham mentioned

I soaked it up

More more more

Every instruction I would ask why and dissect it as deeply as I could

Until it felt simple enough in my mind that I could repeat it alone

But then something happened

After about the third session 

Graham went quiet 

I spent about half an hour riding in circle before I couldn’t hold back anymore and I burst out loud

“Anything I can do? Anything I can work on”

Again, I was desperate to improve at this meaningful craft I was extremely passionate about

Graham smiled

Took a breath 

And said

“Mate, at this point, there’s nothing else to talk about

You just need time in the saddle”

I sighed

I knew exactly what he meant

All my passion, drive, determination, excitement… I had wobbled off the path

I was more interested in feeling like I was getting better

Than actually doing the work required to get better

What’s my point?

There comes a time 

When thinking and feeling can slip over into replacing actions which result in actual progression

Sometimes

The most important thing I can do

Is just get some time in the saddle 

No more talking

No more thinking

Just ride

Get those reps in which can’t be replaced by anything else

Hope this helps

X 

Planking Under Pressure

Once upon a time

There was a boy called John

John grew up in a remote town at the edge of the world (in New Zealand)

John was a curious boy

He loved to play pretend

His favourite thing was to dress up with his friends and go on fantastic adventures

The deep jungles of the Congo

The misty mountain tops of the Himalayas 

Riding horses across the Mongolian Steppe 

John loved the stories, the relationships, the worlds he created with people he loved

John recognised that he wanted more of it

He dreamed of standing on stage and performing in the school play

Getting to play pretend with even more friends, costumes and sets

So much joy!

But when he auditioned for the play

Something happened

John had spent all week practicing his lines

And when his teacher asked him to stand on the stage to give his audition piece

John’s little body began to tremble

His throat went tight

His mouth became dry

His small tummy felt like it was turning inside out

John stepped up onto the big stage

He looked down at the sea of his classmates’ eyes 

And he forgot what to do

Everything went silent 

He tried to speak but he couldn’t remember a single line

He struggled to breathe

John hated what he was feeling

He wanted it to end

And when his classmates began to laugh and snicker

He turned and ran to the bathroom to hide

John was devastated 

He loved playing pretend

But when he got the opportunity to do it for the school play

He felt like he couldn’t anymore

John became quiet at school

He stopped joining in at recess with his friends

And when his best friend asked him to join in

He replied 

“Playing is stupid”

And came up with all kinds of excuses as to why he wouldn’t do it anymore

John was clearly hurt and trying to protect himself from feeling hurt again

Then

One day

A stuntman came to his school to put on a show

All the kids gathered to watch

John deliberately sat at the back of the crowd

Curious, but still in his shell

The stuntman began to perform incredible feats 

Death defying acts

The daredevil tumbled down stairs unscathed

Threw a boomerang and caught it

He even set his hand on fire without getting burned

Extraordinary!

Then

For the stunt mans’ final act

He placed a plank between two of the schools’ buildings

A staggering 3 meters high!

The stunt man took a big breath

The drumroll on the boombox played

And then he walked across the plank

Not once

Not twice

But three times!

John watched in sheer awe 

All the other kids screamed with applause 

“Bravo!” 

Then

The stuntman came down to where the children were standing with glee

And placed the plank on the ground

He asked all the children to walk across it one at a time

John was confused

He looked at the plank

Looked ahead

Took a few small & simple steps

And crossed the plank with ease

John was confused and looked up at the stuntman

The stuntman smiled

He kneeled down to John and said

“The plank is the same

You walked across it with ease

All I did was put it up higher

So it took your breath away

But the plank didn’t change

Your perception of it did”.

He was right

John recognised immediately 

That’s the difference between playing pretend with his friends and being on the stage

There is none!

Only his perceptions 

It’s the same thing he did every day

The same fun and simple play

All the other stuff...

The stage, the lights, the set, the crowd, the eyes, the costumes

That’s all an illusion

A distraction

Bingo!

John recognised it was his responsibility to notice when his imagination was running away with him

And to bring it back to what was within his control:

Having a playful and honest conversation with the person standing opposite him

John breathed with ease

He knew what to do next.

At the next recess break

John found his teacher standing in the playground

He walked up to her

Tugged on her dress 

Looked up at her with his curious little glassy eyes

And said

“Miss,

I’d like to try again, please”

Hope this helps

X 

First Three Reps Don’t Count

I went surfing on the weekend…

Let me start this again

I tried to go surfing on the weekend

I love the word “try”

It’s the opposite of what was jammed down my gullet during school

“Don’t say TRY”

“Trying is weak”

“You WILL do it”

Thank you life-coaching postcard 

Any who

I tried to go surfing on the weekend

It’s been 7 years since I last caught a wave (on a stand up paddle board)

So paddling out using my arms to catch some barrels is absolutely not my forte 

The waves were nice and small 

I had a lovely friend with me who is very experienced 

And the sun came out so I could clearly see the ocean floor

But as perfect as the setup was

It took me about 30 seconds to feel completely overwhelmed 

Paddling out with a foam board meant I wasn’t able to duck-dive smoothly 

So when the waves came through whilst I was trying to make it passed the break

I got bashed around like a cork in a whirlpool 

Within just a few moments

I felt like a complete failure

“I can’t even get passed the break”

“Everyone else can do this”

“This is pathetic”

It felt strange to be speaking to myself that way

(It’s been a while since I heard such a critical voice in my head)

But then I remembered

It’s been years since I actually paddled out

And even then… I’ve was never actually able to consistently catch waves and stand up

It felt lovely to admit to myself the truth

That I have no idea what I’m doing

So why am I putting so much pressure on myself like I should know?

I then remembered one of my favourite things I read about an olympic level athlete who I’m a big fan of

“The first 3 reps don’t count”

Yes!

I love that!

The first 3 reps are purely just to get in the arena

To give one’s-self permission to suck

After those first 3 reps?

Permission to start making adjustments

But those first 3…

No correcting

No fixing

No solving

Just get messy

Just play :)

So?

I took a breath

Laughed at how much I was flailing like a drowning monkey

Paddled in the most uncoordinated fashion

And just managed to make it passed the break

(Which was a win in itself)

Did everything magically become amazing then?

Nope

It sucked

I caught one wave in

Stood up and turned to my friend with the biggest smile of the decade

But then became so tired trying to get passed the break again 

That I went an sat on the beach to catch my breath

I gave up

Tapped out

Surrendered 

And it felt glorious…

Tried to go surfing for the first time in almost a decade

Just managed to stand on one wave

WAHOO

Now time for an Açai bowl and some honest conversations with an old friend

A great first try

Yes

I still suck at surfing

I didn’t end up winning the Rip Curl Bells Beach Comp

But I’m happy

It was my first of 3 attempts

So I’m not even going to give it much thought

I’ll go suck another 2 times (at least)

Then maybe start having a think about trying to improve.

What’s my point?

When it comes to all the different aspect of managing one’s acting career

Self Tapes

Call Backs

Director Meetings

Writing Scripts

Waiting Well

Game Plans

Game Days

First Day’s on set

Handling Pressure

New Accents

New linguistic styles

Practice

Coaches

Acting Classes 

Etc

The first three reps don’t count.

Hope this helps

X 

When It’s All Too Much

Once upon a time

I was stepping off stage at the Sydney Opera House

Night after night

And I simply wanting to give up.

I was 25 years old

I had worked my bottom off from the age 15 

And I was finally leading a major production playing one of Shakespeare’s great roles

I had an expectation that this would be a dream-come-true experience

But here’s what actually happened…

Very early into rehearsals

I was holding tightly onto what my expectations were 

Where I thought I should be

Rather than accepting where I actually was

And instead of communicating that I was struggling

I went inwards

I thought I’d solve it by pushing through

Using more force

On the second show

I lost my voice

(Not the funnest situation when you know you have about 112 shows left)

To combat this

I went to the doctor

They gave me steroids for my vocal chords

A side effect from the pills was I lost sleep

I became increasingly tired

My stresses increased

Again, rather than putting my hand up and connecting with others

I went inwards and thought I would solve through pushing

(I hadn’t learned other ways yet)

I pushed some more

And on the 12th show 

I hit my hand so hard on the back wall of the stage during my opening speech

I gave myself bursitis in my right shoulder

This meant that if I held my right arm up

It would occasionally give up on me

And just fall without my knowing

I did’t ask for help

I thought I’d solve it myself

I decided to switch all physical stuff to my left arm

And on the 20th show 

I gave myself bursitis in my left shoulder

Yup

I now was on steroids for my vocal chords

Was not sleeping because of the pills 

And had no use of either of my arms

Which meant I stopped all physical activity 

It was all too much

And it didn’t take long

Before I feel into a deep dark hole

Of course I did 

I had lost the use of my body

I was pushing emotions aside

And I was letting my brain swirl in whichever direction it wanted 

Which of course, under pressure, it did what it’s designed to do in order to protect me

And became very reactive to external stimuli

So looking back

It makes complete sense to me now that 60 shows later

I found lying inside of an MRI machine

Hating everything

And reactive to everything that was outside of my control 

It was our wonderful stage manager who eventually said to me 

We have all the systems in place to take care of you

But at the end of the day

We can’t do anything unless you tell us what’s going on

It’s you who has the responsibility to say what is so for you

At that point

I fell apart

I admitted where I was 

I told them I felt like a failure because I wasn’t able to handle things the way I expected

But that I simply couldn’t sustain what was happening any more 

And within 24 hours

I had physio appointments booked in

Doctor meetings scheduled

And was sitting in my hotel room with my understudy helping him with his lines

I dropped from 8 shows a week to 6

And began to slow down

It was the start of a new chapter for me

It ignited a curiosity in sustainable performance 

And 8 years later 

When I’m not giving my own performance

I’m helping others with theirs 

Why the hell am I sharing all this?

Well

As is the norm with all natural systems

Cycles occur

Ebbs and flows

Things come in waves

And I’ve recently been reminded about this idea of when it’s all too much

In the last 3 months

I have moved from Maroubra (Place of Thunder) to Curl Curl (River of Life)

On top of filming a new Disney+ series

Studying university

Teaching 

Coaching

Auditioning 

Car shopping

And getting a nursery ready for the arrival of my first born in June

Ugh

Of course

There have been moments where it’s been too much

And where I have felt completely overwhelmed 

So

This one’s for myself today

For when it’s all to much :)

Here we go

One

Notice it

That’s bloody sure worth celebrating

Why?

Because I’m aware

And if I’m aware

Then I can make a new choice

Two

Slow down

I want to do less than I think I can handle

It takes a shit load of courage to surrender to chaos 

And to do less in a moment where my belief systems tell me to push harder and go faster

Three

Bring it back to the basics 

Shift my physiology - move & breathe

Acknowledged and accept where I actually am - give up on where I think or feel I should be

Give my Reticular Activating System clear and simple things to focus on

“I am honest, I take my time, I focus on what I can control”, etc

Four

Prioritise what is most important for now

What do I actually need to say yes to?

What do I need to let go of, or say no to?

Again, it takes trust in myself to do less than I think I can handle

Five

Connect with people I love

People who fill my cup

Who float my boat.

And finally

Remember

This is not forever

It’s just for now 

What to do next?

Go buy an ice cream 

Obviously

So

To clarify 

When it’s all too much

Slow down

And go back to basics

There is nothing sexier than the fundamentals 

That’s some sustainable stuff right there

Hope this helps

X 

Actor’s Self Talk

The world of performance coaching

By that I mean

Coaches who help artists, athletes, CEO’s, etc, perform better 

Is filled with plenty of bells and whistles

And who doesn’t love a good bell or whistle!?

The latest gadget that measures heart rate variability 

Wearable rings that track sleep and determine how much someone can push themselves in training when they wake

Monitors to indicate when someone is too stressed needs to take a breath

Science is certainly making things interesting in the world of performance

Like a rainbow coloured milkshake

But as much fun as it all can be 

There’s something I love more

A clear glass of water

Mmm

Simple

Fundamental 

Incredibly valuable

What I’m more curious about than the latest technique or gadget

Is the work that helps the work most

I repeat 

The work… that helps the work… most

When I look at the people who I believe are the best in the game at helping performers

The coaches who actually walk the walk

Nope

Not many bells

Not many whistles

No rainbow coloured milkshakes to be seen

Their work tends to be simpler (not necessarily easier) 

Pen

Paper

Deep thought

The work

You know what I mean

The work

If you told me 

Yo Mike, you can only help one last performer before your times up on this Earth 

I’d sigh

And say…

Go into nature

With your pad and your pen

Sit down

Think of an event or experience you have coming up where you’re required to perform under pressure

It could be an audition

A meeting

A game

A first day on set for that new show 

Maybe an opening night on stage at the Sydney Opera House

Now

Put your timer on for 7 minutes

And begin writing

How would you like to speak to yourself when you wake up on the morning of that event?

Write it 

Seems pretty basic right?

Bit too simple?

Possibly like a glass of water?

Yep

The fundamentals

There is not a single person on this earth who is responsible for the way that you speak to yourself

Other than you

That responsibility lies on your shoulders

And guess what 

You do have a choice in the matter

(As bloody hard as that can feel sometimes)

The best coaches in the game know

How you speak to yourself

Moment to moment

Is going to have one of the biggest influences on your life and work

So my advice

Try it

Just once

Just for 7 minutes

Write as if you were solely responsible for how you guide yourself before stepping into a big performance

Imagine the dream case scenario

Imagine if you just said 

Screw it! I’m going to take care of myself better than ever before

How would you communicate?

Would it be kind? 

Compassionate? 

Fun? 

Playful? 

Focused? 

Clear? 

Honest? 

Supportive? 

Loving?

Guiding?

Nurturing? 

Inspiring?

What if you were guiding your 5 year old self?

What if your 5 year old self was guiding you?

Write your inner monologue 

Your Self Talk

The dialogue you have with yourself 

This is one of those exercises that might feel icky for a few seconds or sentences

Just dive in

I’m interested in what you experience

And if what comes out of you is something you’d like to maybe experience more of?

Curious

Self Talk

Practice how you speak to yourself under pressure

Might just be the most delicious glass of water you’ll ever drink

Hope this helps

X