Balls in Holes

Once upon a time

I was helping a golfer

He was about to fly overseas to represent Australia in a big tournament in Canada

After hearing him talk about about the competition, the politics of golf, and all the things out of his control

I asked him what he wanted

He spent the next hour telling me what he didn’t want

Quite normal

We are human beings

Designed to survive 

Always trying to protect ourselves from danger (both real and perceived)

He didn’t want to do badly 

He didn’t want to land in the bunkers

He didn’t want to look stupid 

But most of all, he didn’t want to hit a crowd member as he teed off

It sounded pretty exhausting

The infinite possibilities of things he didn’t want

So I asked him again

“What do you want?”

He got the gist, realising he was focussing on all his past frustrations and future anxieties 

We began talking about the best experiences he’d had 

The times when he felt proudest of his performance

The times he felt the most energised

The times when he felt in flow

He told me about what it was like to play golf when he was a kid

The play, the freedom, the being in nature, the connection, the clarity, the clean and easy swing, the focus, the joyful obsession

Then he went quiet

He was clicking into something

He looked up at me with an expression like a toddler

Carefree, present, calm, joyful, easy

And with a smile, he said

“Mike, I just wanna put the fuckin ball in the hole”