Peaks & Valleys

Ups and downs, smiles and frowns

I parked my car this morning before heading in to teach the 3rd year actors at NIDA

I gave my phone a little glance before I exited the vehicle

Message received

08:45 - “…forwarding your agent this email I got from xxxx.

They want you for the lead role in their feature film, shooting in xxxxxx, USA”

Oh, cool!

What a way to start the week

Onwards.

I stepped into class and we started again

Focussing on the things we could control

Building unique systems and process to help us technically give the work we want to, when we want to

I noticed myself pacing the room

Slightly angsty

Mmm

We took 5 for a bathroom break

I gave in to my curiosity

I pulled out my phone

Downloaded the email app (I usually don’t have emails accessible on my phone)

And discovered a thread of emails going back and forth

My face at this point was about 4 inches from the screen

09:05 - “interested in Michael for the lead role “XXXX”,  we are shooting in Late July 2022…”

My heart is pounding

09:08 - “Is he available at this time and able to work in the US?”

My breath is shortening

09:10 - “Casting is quite urgent and I'll have to push this to the directors if he's keen.”

Back and forth

Producer to casting to agent, back to casting, back to producer

The details

The glorious details

Lead role. USA. July

Cast

YES

Script

YES

Concept lookbook

OH YES PLEASE YES

And then…

09:13 - “Unfortunately it'd be too tight on this one…”

I stop

My eyelids give up and I let them close

Just like that

It’s gone

Done and dusted

My Monday morning roller coaster lasted approximately 28 minutes

I exit the bathroom

My back hurts

My neck feels heavy

My throat is tight

I step back into the classroom

And we start again

We get back to the important work

The simple, doable things

The setting up of little habits that compound over time

A bunch of things happened outside of my control this morning

A glorious example of the peaks and valleys of this industry all within an hour of time

Those ups will happen

And following them will be the downs

The balance

The reestablishing of order

This too shall pass

I might not be flying to the USA in July…

But I can still focus on giving my all to an audition I have tonight

Or take half an hour to sit on the headland in the rain with binoculars and watch the whales begin their long journey North

Or… simply take an hour to lie on the couch and give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling

To feel the disappointment

The frustration

The hurt

Then take a breath

And get back to it

Onwards

x

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