Find Comfort in the Chaos
Principle #4: Find comfort in the chaos
Here’s a question…
Do you want a life with no storms?
Or
Do you want to be able to ride out the storms?
There is a bottleneck in this industry
Actor’s who can handle the storms of pressure move through the bottle neck
Stop
I really don’t like the sentence I just wrote
Do I think it’s actually true?
Nope
I have gotten main roles on TV shows when I literally was shaking in the audition in front of the director
So overwhelmed with nerves
And sometimes I haven’t even made it past the first round of casting when I have felt I was the coolest cucumber to grace the planet
So what are we actually talking about here?
Back to the biggest bad ass of the 80’s
Mike Tyson
Here’s some footage of him feeling terrified and crying before a fight (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKjK95aRrhc)
Now, what was that famous thing his coach said?
“The hero and the coward both feel the same thing, but the hero uses his fear, while the coward runs. It’s the same thing, fear, but it’s what you do with it that matters.”
How can I still go play and give my best work even when I’m feeling under pressure?
Let’s boil this down to one fundamental concept: Notice & Bring it back
Notice what?
Notice the dissonance
Dissonance = A lack of harmony in the mind/body
You know that moment when you’re feeling nervous and your body and mind start doing different things?
(Tight throat, sweaty palms, stiff neck, raised heart beat, cloudy mind, negative thoughts popping up, woozie tummy, etc etc)
Basically, when we start to protect ourselves from a perceived threat to our survival…
Let’s put them under the umbrella of “dissonance”
Side note
There is a requirement here
In order to notice the dissonance
You have to listen to your body
Obey nature
She will always win in the long run
So listen to her
What signals is she giving you?
Listen to them
Notice the dissonance
Then what?
Bring it back to process
What process?
Well
What process do you want to have?
Make it up!
You get to choose
Whatever you want
Try different things
See what works for you
I’ll point you in a direction to get you started
One: Shift your physiology
Work outside in
Do something physical to affect your brain chemistry
Move
Shake
Jiggle
Stretch
Dance
Sing
Pray
Bath
Jump in the ocean
Walk in nature
Exercise
Sweat
Sit in an ice tub
Have a cold shower
Do a breathing exercise
Yoga Nidra
Breath of fire
Wim Hof
Doesn’t matter what it is
Pick what works for you
What’s important is you shift your physiology
Two: Acknowledge & Accept where you are (give up on where you think/feel you should be)
I find Roy London’s Personal Inventory exercise really helpful
90 seconds of saying…
“I feel x, I feel y, I feel z”
Say what is so for you
Remember, it’s not what you’re feeling that causes issues
It’s judging those feelings which allows problems to arise
Ie, “I’m feeling nervous, and thats a bad thing”
There’s another important fundamental here of replacing a fixed mindset with a growth mindset
Fixed mindset: “Good, bad, right, wrong”
Growth mindset: “Curious, what is this telling me? What can I learn from this?”
Three: Clear your RAS (Reticular Activating System)
Help your brain help you
Be clear about what you want
2 simple questions to help you get clear
One: How do you want to feel at the end?
(Example: I feel proud of myself)
Two: What’s one action step to help you sustainably get there?
(Example: I am honest)
Okay
If I don’t stop now I will go down 23 more rabbit holes
I’ll leave the rest for the EBook
But to summarise
Create your own process for handling pressure
Turn it into a ritual
Freaking out in the trailer and only have 10 minutes before you’re needed on set?
Know your call to stage is happening in 5 minutes and feeling like you’re about to vomit?
About to step into the producer’s room for the final casting meeting and feeling yourself doing the fakest smile ever witnessed in the history of all mankind?
No problemo
Notice it
Then bring it back to process
Shift your physiology (mooooooove)
Acknowledge & Accept where you are (give up on where you “should” be)
Clear your RAS (help your brain help you)
Then go do you booboo
Hope this helps
Feel free to send me any questions as this is a massive topic that I love discussing :)
x