At What Cost?

QUESTION:

Hey Mike! Hope you’re doing well. Question for your newsletter. I am currently shooting a series and am immensely self-conscious between action and cut. Usually, I find freedom, a sense of play, and a willingness to fail in that magic space. My last job was utterly freeing, and the director championed putting it all out there; however, this current job has been different. The director wants EXACT choices I made in the wide up close, no improv, no dialogue changes, and every offer is restrained. Script supervisor is ruthless to the point of "You exhaled your cigarette on that word and touched your left eye on this one", and the dialect coach is in the ear, "nope watch the upward inflection". Basically, everything between action and cut has become technical, and I am leaving scenes noticing that I am now acting for myself to hit these markers and utterly absent from my scene partner. Although I am fine with the technicalities of this medium, e.g. you won't always be in the moment, camera awareness is crucial, and sometimes you gotta bullshit to catch the light, but this has gone far beyond general screen awareness. Any tips to get out of my head and work within the constraints? Much love, Simba (name changed from privacy sake) x

ANSWER:

Simba

Holy smokes

What a scenario!

Thank you for this beautifully detailed question.

This sounds…

Honestly?

This sounds freaking exhausting.

Firstly

Let’s zoom out

This is one acting job

In your long career

So the fact that you are feeling “Immensely self-conscious between action and cut”

Let’s tack onto the end of that sentence

“And that’s okay”

It sure as hell sounds like it feels bloody frustrating & uncomfortable

But…

(And apologies if this comes across as naff but I genuinely believe this)

To be dealing with this complex challenge early in your career

This sounds like a wonderful problem to be working on for now

One which I know will pay dividends in the future

Okay

“Usually, I find freedom, a sense of play, and a willingness to fail in that magic space”

Simba

I am whole-heartedly going to agree with you on this

I am lucky enough to know your work

And what’s more

I have been lucky enough to see your work behind the curtain

You sir, play freely with a bloody incredible willingness to fail.

So when you use the term “magic space”

I believe you.

Now

When it comes to doing exactly what is asked of you

Sure

With your training and skillset

I think you know, as well as I do, that you are more than capable of doing everything that is being “asked” of you

However

The pivotal question is…

At what cost?

People might look at you from the outside and think

“You’re just lucky to have a job when so many others don’t”

Or

“Stop being difficult and get on with it”

Or

“Who cares!? Just do exactly what’s asked of you for a couple more months and then go do whatever you want”

But

No one…

I really mean this

Not a single person on this earth

Will ever fully understand what it costs you to not give your work your way

For you to sacrifice that “magic space”.

Story time

A dear friend of mine

Landed the understudy role of the protagonist in a huge hit musical straight after graduating from drama school

Now

Musicals

(You can see where this is going)

We are talking about a style which involves hundreds of lighting positions, sound cues, and movements which require extreme precision

All of which are to be repeated

Night, after night, after night

Basically

There is not a huge amount of room for creative freedom in the moment

However

To make matters more difficult

The director was obsessed with making this actor do exactly what the lead of the show has been doing

“Johnny says that line like this…”

“Johnny smiles on this word, not that word”

“Johnny says that quieter”

This carried on for a few weeks

My dear friend was feeling controlled, used, manipulated, pushed & pulled.

From the outside

It looked like a dream opportunity

A fresh graduate

First job

Guaranteed at least 2 shows a week understudying one of the worlds leading musical actors in one of the greatest musical hits of the passed few decades

But people didn’t know what is was costing him

To not have any sense of creative input

No sense of autonomy

His art - his magic space - The thing he had just spent 3 years giving his blood, sweat and tears to

Became

“Hit your mark, hit the note and do it like Johnny did it”

Until, one day, it simply cost him too much

After yet another comment of

“Johnny wouldn’t do it like that”

My friend just snapped

“I’M NOT JOHHNY!!!”

The room went quiet

You see

For my friend

It wasn’t worth it

To be paid as an actor to work on a great professional job

The result was not worth the process

The result wasn’t worth sacrificing his magic space

In fact

Most generous artists I know

Gun to the head

Would prefer a miserable result which comes from an invigorating process

Over a stunning result which comes from a miserable process

Why?

The process is more valuable than the result

It’s the process which will continue to provide food on the table over the long run

It’s the process which will provide sustainable work over ones career

It’s the process which will help them put their head on the pillow feeling fulfilled night after night

Not a one single glorious result which the artist had no real creative input towards

Now

Obviously

I’m not suggesting you snap back and shout for your right to give your work your way

Not at all

My friend was young and new to the industry

But what I am floating the idea of here is

Permission to start the conversation with your colleagues

Healthy artistic change on the job starts with someone going first

It starts with someone putting their hand up and being honest

Simba

If I was directing you

And wanting you do do everything that myself and the team was asking

And I saw you take a slow, kind breath

Look me in the eyes and say

“Mike, can we chat? Just struggling a bit at the moment, mate”

I would lean in

I promise you

I would lean in

What’s more

Is that you dropping your guard

Would encourage me to drop mine

Why is this important?

Well

For a director to enforce such strong levels of control

Something tells me its probably coming from a fair bit of fear

Something tells me that person is feeling a lot of pressure to provide a pristine result within a short amount of time

And if a conversation begins

Then the understanding of each others position begins

And people can begin to move forward with a sense of compassion

And possibly even with a sense of wiggle room

For example

What happened to my friend?

Well

The following break

He was approached by the director

And they had a conversation

About where things were at

And how they could move things forward together

It was clear to the director that my friend was miserable

It was clearly costing him too much to just be a puppet and to not have any sense of autonomy

But what surprised my friend

Was that he began to understand the situation the director was in too

The immense pressure the director was under from the team in America

For the show to be exactly the same regardless of which actor was stepping into the understudy position

The two even laughed about the similarities of what they were both experiencing

And from that place of acknowledgement & acceptance

Oddly

They began to play

The play might not have been the size at which my friend was use to

Or as overtly as they might have liked

But within the structures that were required for that specific job to happen

They zoomed in to find the tiny crevices in which they could do it their way

The moment before they stepped onto stage as they warmed up behind the curtain

The wiggling of the toes hidden by their shoe

The choice to wave with their right hand rather than their left

The secret their character was hiding behind that specific line of dialogue

Whats my point?

Control of other creatives

Usually stems from a place of fear

And just like me

Creatives get real scared

Scared of losing their pay check

Scared of their work not being enough

Scared of where or when the next job might happen

But at the same time

No one knows ever fully knows what their fear & control is costing you

So permission to speak up

Permission to express when you’re struggling with the work

And permission to zoom in to find the smaller space for you to play

The moment before your take

The pause that’s half a second longer…

There is always something

No matter how small

That is within your control

My advice?

Have have fun finding it.

Hope this helps

X